CEO of an executive coaching firm, Dr. Kimberly Janson, recently told Forbes, “We often do not see ourselves how others experience us, both on the upside of our strengths and positive attributes and the downside regarding our deficiencies. When asked about ourselves, we will often say how much we know ourselves, ‘Believe me; I know myself – the good, the bad, and the ugly.’ The reality is it is not true. And the fallacy of this has a profound impact in the workplace, among other places.”
How self-aware are you? And if you think you are – do you know your strengths and limitations regarding this crucial life skill? This article discusses the signs of low self-awareness and drills down specific actions from thought leaders that can help raise self-awareness to reach your maximum potential.
What is Self-Awareness?
Before deconstructing how self-aware we are or need to be, it’s essential to understand what self-awareness is and what it entails. Therapist Marcelle J. Craig, LMFT, suggests to Real Simple, “Self-awareness is about looking at who you are in a way that acknowledges how you impact others [and] how they impact you. It also involves understanding your emotions and internal narrative, allowing you to lead a fulfilling life. It’s the first step to changing and growing.” Craig also adds, “The practice of self-awareness is just that: a practice. Learning how to be self-aware is a life-long journey, and it’s never too late to start.” Before any self-discovery journey, it is crucial to see where you fall on the scale of self-awareness.
How Self-Aware Are You?
(HBR) discovered that although 95% of people think they are self-aware, only 10 to 15% actually are. To help recognize if this is an issue, HBR found several consistent behaviors of low self-aware individuals, including
- Inability to empathize with or take the perspective of others.
- Hurtful to others without realizing it.
- Difficulty “reading a room” and tailoring their message to their audience.
- They possess a grandiose opinion of their contributions and performance.
- Consistently take credit for successes and blame others for failures.
- Getting angry and defensive when genuine and objective feedback is offered.
Another HBR article offers more subtle scales of self-awareness or The Four Self-Awareness Archetypes, including
Introspectors – Individuals who are clear on who they are but do not challenge their views by getting feedback from others.
Aware – Individuals who know who they are, what they want to accomplish, and value others’ opinions.
Seekers – Individuals who do not know who they are, what they stand for, and how others see them.
Pleasers – Individuals who are so concerned about appearing a certain way to others that they may overlook what is important to them. Over time they make choices that are not in service to their fulfillment.
How to Raise Your Self-Awareness & Potential
Before we discuss how to boost self-awareness, it’s vital to understand why this is significant. Harvard Business Review suggests that when we see ourselves clearly, we are more likely to be:
- Confident and creative
- Effective communicators
- Making sounder decisions
- Building stronger relationships
- Better workers who receive more promotions
- More effective leaders with more satisfied employees and profitable companies
How can we improve our self-awareness? It starts with honest introspection. Linkedin provides easy steps to developing habits that will increase self-awareness. These tips are proven to help in professional development and personal growth.
Inquire: This act means asking yourself where you are and where you would like to be. Linkedin also offers basic questions to give friends, family, and co-workers to ask you, such as “What are my top five strengths and weaknesses?” and “What is one area I can change that would make me a better person?”
Test: Linkedin suggests there are good, solid assessment tools that can help build a clearer picture of your personality. Many have a different focus, so reviewing them allows you to examine which ones provide the best fit for you. For example, our COSEC (Cognitive Orientation & Social-Emotional Competency) assessment is the first-ever cognitive propensity and aptitude tool that incorporates the environmental impact on the individual. Simply put, it helps individuals grow awareness of their aptitudes, understand the “why” behind who they are, and unlock their full potential.
Reflect: Self-assessment tools will not be helpful if individuals do not utilize the information. While working to identify your personality traits, reflect on what you’ve discovered. What does this information tell you about who you are?
Organize: Once you’ve identified aspects of your personality, take the time to organize them neatly to solidify them in your mind. Give yourself an example of those characteristics or dimensions at their best and their weakest. Or find a report that will do that for you.
Plan: Once you’ve organized, it is time to plan and see what specific, measurable intentions you can set to improve your self-awareness. Set goals for yourself that align with your observations. Organizing your thoughts in an online tool, like AccompliTrack, or in a journal.
Experiment: Create measurable criteria for some of your goals. Linkedin gives the following example, “To help me be more aware of how vital the team I work with is to my success, I want to intentionally acknowledge the contributions of at least one of my co-workers every week for four months.”
Confer: Gain an outsider’s perspective as to how your plans have worked. Allow these friends, family, or colleagues to dig deeper with you. Trial and error will help you better understand what will and will not work.
Tune: Examining your self-awareness is a life-long journey. You will complete these steps several times during your life. Continue to fine-tune your goals, plans, and self-assessments to understand who you are and to reach your maximum potential.
